The Pregnant Pause:Our TTC Journey

Yesterday, I was getting ready for a big day at work. My boss's boss was coming in to do some coaching and observations on us so I had a lot on my mind. That was lucky because it kept the nerves and anxiety from really kicking in until about an hour before my appointment. I had woken up extremely nauseous that morning so I was expecting good things but you can't help but be nervous after the last two pregnancies we had. This ultrasound had not gone well in either of those. I decided I was going to stop and get myself something to eat for lunch beforehand and Devan asked if I should be eating before the ultrasound. I told him I didn't think it mattered considering it was a transvaginal ultrasound but that got me all paranoid and decided on a corn dog as a snack. I was called into the exam room by the same ultrasound technician who had helped diagnose both miscarriages... She remembered me and asked me how I was doing. I told her I was nervous and she was very positive. S...

Let me start this by saying to all of you women who have dealt with morning sickness or Hypermesis Gravidarum, I applaud you for making it through it. Holy cow. When I was pregnant with Reilly, I did have some on and off nausea but mostly I suffered for debilitating migraines. I always said I'd rather deal with nausea than migraines. That still might be true though I'm not too sure now. Yesterday, I hit 6 weeks of pregnancy and celebrated with a bang. I invited my toilet, a trash can, and all the food I'd eaten at the Super Bowl party the night before and we just had a blast. Yes... For the first time, I threw up while being pregnant... Not only did I do it once... No, I did it FIVE times. All within a span of 2.5 hours. I was completely worthless the rest of the day. I was so nauseous and weak that I couldn't do anything. I was literally confined to the couch all day. At the advice of some of my friends who've dealt with bad morning sickness in the past, I swallowe...

There comes a time in your life where you go to bed at 7:30PM every night... That's me... At the ripe old age of 27. I have never been so tired in my entire life. That includes my pregnancy with my son and the two miscarriages last year. For those of you that don't know me, I'm a pretty energetic person so to barely make it out of bed every day after 10+ hours of sleep is such a strange thing. I've also been blessed with early morning sickness and heartburn. I didn't get morning sickness with Reilly until probably 7 weeks. I didn't get heartburn until closer to my second trimester. To be getting both of these things before I'm even 6 weeks is blowing my mind. I sometimes have a feeling I'm carrying twins but I'm probably crazy. I keep getting that inkling though... Maybe it's wishful thinking. I've always wanted twins. I was a twin and never got to experience that twin bond because my twin was miscarried. I've always wanted to see that bo...

It's been awhile since I posted on here but today I felt the urge to write. I started an email for my almost-two year old son a few weeks before his first birthday. I was reading through the emails I sent him and came across two emails telling him he was going to be a big brother and two emails telling him we'd lost both babies. It's a weird feeling going back to those moments. They feel so long ago even though they really weren't. We were lucky to find out we were pregnant again last week on Martin Luther King Jr. Day. As weird as it sounds, it is perfect. We found out on a day that was dedicated to a man who had a dream. Granted, his dream was a little different than mine but the sentiment is the same. We are also due the month of Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness which is pretty special. What is strange is you'd think I'd be terrified! While I am scared I've also realized that stressing over everything isn't going to help anything. I'm just goin...

Hey everyone! I'm wanting to discuss how your cycles can be affected by a chemical pregnancy. Considering, I have first hand experience with this now I think it might help others who are currently or have recently experienced a chemical pregnancy. Even though chemical pregnancies are miscarriages before 5 weeks (mine was 4 weeks, 1 day) they can still impact the following cycle in different ways. Some women find they take a long time to ovulate afterwards. Some find they ovulate very quickly afterwards and much earlier than usual. That was the case for me. I had read some advice to start OPKs right after my period ended because my hormones could be all out of whack. My period was longer and heavier than normal with a ton of clots. I was finally period free on CD8 and that is when I started OPKs. It was crazy for me to already see a fairly dark line. Granted, it was still negative but I knew that a positive OPK was only days away. On CD10, I had a really dark line on the OPK but...

Well, I'm uttering the words I never thought I'd say. We have just experienced a chemical pregnancy. It sucks. This is how it all went down. We were in Colorado for our two year wedding anniversary and had the most amazing time. Towards the end of our trip I started feeling off. I'd get nauseous and headaches, insane hot flashes, I was drinking water like I was in the desert... Not to mention I ate part of a hard boiled egg in my salad at dinner one night and about died. Anyway,that night we had actually went to see a psychic. Yes, I'm sure some of you just rolled your eyes. It was for fun and I was taking everything she said with a grain of salt. I kid you not though... The first thing she said to me when we walked in was, "Are you pregnant?!" I replied with, "Not that I know of!" She then said that I'd be pregnant this year. She could see that. Well, two days later I was home and decided to take a pregnancy test. I was prescribed 100mg of pro...